paving a way

“Only a month left now”, said my sister. She is expecting and only a month is left for the delivery. “I am so excited but anxious as well. The child would take the centre stage of my life. And am afraid how Sachin would cope with it. I would be no longer able to give him the love and attention that I used to give.” Sachin is her husband and she looked visibly uneasy while saying this.

She was showing the apparent signs of a fretful to-be-mother. Not fretful because of the pain that the delivery would ensure but because of the fact that her love, which earlier her husband had the full pie of, would now be shared.

I was listening to her, just listening and didn’t respond.

I knew what to say but I couldn’t. I don’t know why. Maybe because I myself didn’t believe in what I was about to say.

After a brief silence when it looked like I would just let it pass, I started “Don’t let the unknown worry you. Our heart is not like a room, where you give an unambiguous position to your things and furniture. Over the period of time, the things just get shifted from one position to another or may just get replaced but the fact would remain that the space remains finite. And if you try to overdo it everything just gets messed up.
Our heart is in fact like the universe, an ever expanding universe. It might have started with a concise size but the sheer force with which it expands over the period of time, the share factor just gets eliminated. Every person carves an impression of his own in your heart, independently and not at the cost another person. You would never compromise to give your love for one person to give it to another person. The space is just so big.”

I could see her nodding. Just then I thought of the number of people whom I had lost touch with over the period of time and who have literally become strangers. Many have left; a few have made their way in. But every transition has been at the cost of some or the other person. Maybe my heart is not expanding; maybe those who have left never actually touched deep inside or maybe it was destiny.

“Hmm..yeah..I just hope so.”, she murmured. But I didn’t respond.
And I was silent again.

Finding Him!!

"They say that God is everywhere, and yet we always think of Him as somewhat of a recluse”. Emily Dickinson
They aimed finding Him in the places made of concrete walls which smelled peculiarly of some scent, by placing his make-believe idol in the middle and sitting in a self-imposed punishment. She tried searching for Him by fasting in His name baring herself from forget food but even water, for He shall be happy and bestow her with whatever her desires are. So what if she dies, after all it would be a sacrifice in His name and she would be given a place in the heaven.
Ancestors categorized some places as the ultimate destination for discovering Him for others to make it easier to get close to Him, feel Him and please Him. He pledged to walk bare foot all the way to a temple which was there at above 500 feet, if at all He gives him the success in his life. Many who could not find Him in these ways, found Him in people who proclaimed themselves as the God of this century. That's another story that the very same person is the God of the criminals.
Many gave up this search, for them it was too tough a task to unearth Him and understand Him. Some never believed in His existence; He was just another figment of imagination for them. A few laughed at others who were His devoted followers.
And a few discovered Him in that single person who had entered their life and made the world go round and was the only reason that they were happy for he was the reason and source of it. With him being around, all they could sense was love for everything around them. Even the toughest of times sailed by smoothly. For he was the reason that they still believed…in Him.
And so did I!!!

fear of an unknown!

Why do you walk along with me,
Keeping an eye on me all the time.
You glare at me every now and then,
Feels like getting lost in a forest that is dense.

I try to walk fast and brisk,
In an attempt to leave you behind.
In a bleak hope of leaving you far off,
I try hard not to get lost in this ride.

I have been walking alone before,
So what is it today that makes you come near me
Having never been in under anyone’s glare
I feel like breaking away for being free.

My shadow being the only thing,
Between you and me in the broad sunlight
What if the distance is eclipsed between us
For that I am scared of the arrival of the night

just another day!

Sometimes even the weather that you always crave for is not good enough to uplift your mood. The breeze with its tender touch was trying hard cheer her up. She turned a cold shoulder to it. The breeze thought of reciprocating in the same way by starting to turn cold. But the only difference being that the breeze was very well aware of the fact that she had always longed for it in this mood only. But the day was different. The more it blew, the more it brought along the memories of what she had left behind. She started hating it for drying up her tears. Her face felt as if it was turning into a stone. The inner thoughts were crying desperately inside to come out. Sitting in the bus, she started looking around, just in case she could get hold of a happy face. She knew somewhere down the line that it was what she wanted a sight of. Because she knew that it was infectious and the very face which was lively could make her happy.
A few minutes passed by, a hawker, who had just entered the bus, was trying hard to convince everyone on board to buy a table mat. Full of zeal, vigour and enthusiasm, the face wasn’t showing even a hint of weariness. He seemed to be bursting with life. This wasn’t for the first time that she was seeing such a hawker but the look on his after no one bought the mat from him was sufficient to make her think twice about travelling in a bus. He was sad, the hawker was sad.
She was eagerly trying to, desperately; find someone who was happy because she wasn’t. She turned back to look for a happy face by any chance. All gloomy faces surrounded her. The search was ending in vain. It seemed as if there was another tunnel at the end of the tunnel. The light seemed as if it ceased to exist. And the ‘rarity’ was now approaching ‘extinction’. The pursuit of happiness was now heading to a dead end.

She just couldn’t see a face..a blissful face.

another CWG article? not really!!

CWG. We all are now well versed with the various full forms that have been given to this acronym. Scams have been the talk of the town; under construction stadiums being reduced to debris after a day of rainfall; Connaught place – once the most sought after shopping paradise, now nothing short of a Sahara desert and a volley of blames being thrown away from one person to another. We have read it all, we have heard it all and we have seen it all. What next? India bidding for 2016 Olympics and getting through? A next series of troubles of another city? A next round of blame game?
Huh..I am sick and tired of this daily dose on CWG fiascos.
But the point that I want to raise here is not this, but the one that concerns me. And I am sure, millions many. While the heart of Delhi, a.k.a CP was still reeling under reconstruction or should I say destruction, a heavily pregnant woman lying in mud puddle gave birth to a child, all that on the busy street of Shankar Market. The woman is no more, while her child narrowly survived the claws of the stray dogs. Seeing beggars on the traffic signals is sure enough a common site, seeing them sleep on the road dividers is usual, homeless drug addicts are just a stone’s throw away but what about this case? They say expect the unexpected, but no I am not ready for this. I am ready to accept my city without lavish stadiums, wider roads, flyovers at every junction, world class public transport. I absolutely love my city – Delhi - for what it is and not what we are trying hard to make out of it. But this incidence is just not tolerable.
I don’t know how I would ever walk through the roads of the same market again. I wish all the time that had I looked over her, she might have been just alive. How could I oversee this? What if I was there at that particular road while she was giving birth? Could things have been any different? It was only after some days that someone came to her rescue. Most of the passers-by would have taken her for another beggar with a baby. But is this any reason for our ignorance? Or are we too busy cribbing about our life, job, and the government?
Any reason surely can’t give an explanation to what happened. And we call ourselves modern, who are so busy in giving a perfect reception to the athletes. While we try to make Delhi into London, lets do the same for the providing the basic standards of living to each of us. Or better still, let’s make ourselves more human to humans. I can assure you, it would not require anything more than love and care.

what is on your mind?

And so she was lost. The presence of 20 odd people around her didn't make matter to her. Lost profoundly in him and in those moments spent with him when they used to hold their hands together and when the time seemed to last till eternity. Her physical presence was almost invisible that evening because she had him deep in her that even the air around her was filled with his scent.

We are often lost, lost deep in our own thoughts. The thoughts that know no boundaries and when all they know is that they are meant to go miles and miles away. Okay, the last line being a bit of exaggeration. But more often than not, whatever percentage of mind that we use, our mind is seldom free..just stating the obvious. What made me mull over such a common instance is that what is it that we think about? Do we keep thinking about the same thing over and over again, until the time we get bored or do we do that because we love it so much which ultimately lets our inner self find solace within. I got no clue. I am stating just some of the many many reasons under the sun for its existence. For some, it might be money, study, friend/boyfriend/girlfriend, family, job, ambition or sex that never lets their mind be free. I don't know what is on my mind that is making me write such a shit. I don't know. But the time when I knew who was in there, he got to know it only to run away as if the place was a prison which was cuffing him down. Only if he could have realized that it was a prison in which I was jailed and not him.

P.S.: Coming to the point, I would lovvve to see your responses about what rules your mind and the reasons behind it!!!

linking of the nodes

Mr.A is our beloved MD teacher. If you haven’t met him, then you have missed out on a conceited and unearthly creature. If you have met him after my recommendation..then well it was only a recommendation. At the end of the day, it was your pick.
So we all have been taught to mug up things, so that they remain on your finger tips. And it is no different with application of cast iron, used in compression. Remember it as C-C (the former C for cast iron, the latter one for compression). Wish I had attended (physical presence is what im referring to..my mind is never there in the class) those relentlessly tedious lectures.
So here it was, my first lecture of MD, his was..ammm..im bad at triple digit numbers.
Hooks material: the blistering topic of discussion.
Question: what is the material of hooks? God!! why do I ever listen to my friends' half baked answers?
Charged as I was (after all it was my first class), I announced uproariously(my friend’s awnswer): Cast iron
A: 'khade ho jao guneet. From which company woood you get it?'
Me: 'sir..mm..Jindal Steel..'
A: 'achha..you woood get a pink slip if you join the company on the very phirst day'
Me: 'why so..?is it coz its a steel company and so it wouldnt make cast iron????'
A: 'so that means you havnt attended my C-C lecture?'
Me: 'mm..carbon copy..?'
Who said there isn’t any short cut to success? When it comes to MD there are, myriad of them. Wish i had realized this earlier..sob sob..