Finding Him!!

"They say that God is everywhere, and yet we always think of Him as somewhat of a recluse”. Emily Dickinson
They aimed finding Him in the places made of concrete walls which smelled peculiarly of some scent, by placing his make-believe idol in the middle and sitting in a self-imposed punishment. She tried searching for Him by fasting in His name baring herself from forget food but even water, for He shall be happy and bestow her with whatever her desires are. So what if she dies, after all it would be a sacrifice in His name and she would be given a place in the heaven.
Ancestors categorized some places as the ultimate destination for discovering Him for others to make it easier to get close to Him, feel Him and please Him. He pledged to walk bare foot all the way to a temple which was there at above 500 feet, if at all He gives him the success in his life. Many who could not find Him in these ways, found Him in people who proclaimed themselves as the God of this century. That's another story that the very same person is the God of the criminals.
Many gave up this search, for them it was too tough a task to unearth Him and understand Him. Some never believed in His existence; He was just another figment of imagination for them. A few laughed at others who were His devoted followers.
And a few discovered Him in that single person who had entered their life and made the world go round and was the only reason that they were happy for he was the reason and source of it. With him being around, all they could sense was love for everything around them. Even the toughest of times sailed by smoothly. For he was the reason that they still believed…in Him.
And so did I!!!

fear of an unknown!

Why do you walk along with me,
Keeping an eye on me all the time.
You glare at me every now and then,
Feels like getting lost in a forest that is dense.

I try to walk fast and brisk,
In an attempt to leave you behind.
In a bleak hope of leaving you far off,
I try hard not to get lost in this ride.

I have been walking alone before,
So what is it today that makes you come near me
Having never been in under anyone’s glare
I feel like breaking away for being free.

My shadow being the only thing,
Between you and me in the broad sunlight
What if the distance is eclipsed between us
For that I am scared of the arrival of the night

just another day!

Sometimes even the weather that you always crave for is not good enough to uplift your mood. The breeze with its tender touch was trying hard cheer her up. She turned a cold shoulder to it. The breeze thought of reciprocating in the same way by starting to turn cold. But the only difference being that the breeze was very well aware of the fact that she had always longed for it in this mood only. But the day was different. The more it blew, the more it brought along the memories of what she had left behind. She started hating it for drying up her tears. Her face felt as if it was turning into a stone. The inner thoughts were crying desperately inside to come out. Sitting in the bus, she started looking around, just in case she could get hold of a happy face. She knew somewhere down the line that it was what she wanted a sight of. Because she knew that it was infectious and the very face which was lively could make her happy.
A few minutes passed by, a hawker, who had just entered the bus, was trying hard to convince everyone on board to buy a table mat. Full of zeal, vigour and enthusiasm, the face wasn’t showing even a hint of weariness. He seemed to be bursting with life. This wasn’t for the first time that she was seeing such a hawker but the look on his after no one bought the mat from him was sufficient to make her think twice about travelling in a bus. He was sad, the hawker was sad.
She was eagerly trying to, desperately; find someone who was happy because she wasn’t. She turned back to look for a happy face by any chance. All gloomy faces surrounded her. The search was ending in vain. It seemed as if there was another tunnel at the end of the tunnel. The light seemed as if it ceased to exist. And the ‘rarity’ was now approaching ‘extinction’. The pursuit of happiness was now heading to a dead end.

She just couldn’t see a face..a blissful face.

another CWG article? not really!!

CWG. We all are now well versed with the various full forms that have been given to this acronym. Scams have been the talk of the town; under construction stadiums being reduced to debris after a day of rainfall; Connaught place – once the most sought after shopping paradise, now nothing short of a Sahara desert and a volley of blames being thrown away from one person to another. We have read it all, we have heard it all and we have seen it all. What next? India bidding for 2016 Olympics and getting through? A next series of troubles of another city? A next round of blame game?
Huh..I am sick and tired of this daily dose on CWG fiascos.
But the point that I want to raise here is not this, but the one that concerns me. And I am sure, millions many. While the heart of Delhi, a.k.a CP was still reeling under reconstruction or should I say destruction, a heavily pregnant woman lying in mud puddle gave birth to a child, all that on the busy street of Shankar Market. The woman is no more, while her child narrowly survived the claws of the stray dogs. Seeing beggars on the traffic signals is sure enough a common site, seeing them sleep on the road dividers is usual, homeless drug addicts are just a stone’s throw away but what about this case? They say expect the unexpected, but no I am not ready for this. I am ready to accept my city without lavish stadiums, wider roads, flyovers at every junction, world class public transport. I absolutely love my city – Delhi - for what it is and not what we are trying hard to make out of it. But this incidence is just not tolerable.
I don’t know how I would ever walk through the roads of the same market again. I wish all the time that had I looked over her, she might have been just alive. How could I oversee this? What if I was there at that particular road while she was giving birth? Could things have been any different? It was only after some days that someone came to her rescue. Most of the passers-by would have taken her for another beggar with a baby. But is this any reason for our ignorance? Or are we too busy cribbing about our life, job, and the government?
Any reason surely can’t give an explanation to what happened. And we call ourselves modern, who are so busy in giving a perfect reception to the athletes. While we try to make Delhi into London, lets do the same for the providing the basic standards of living to each of us. Or better still, let’s make ourselves more human to humans. I can assure you, it would not require anything more than love and care.

what is on your mind?

And so she was lost. The presence of 20 odd people around her didn't make matter to her. Lost profoundly in him and in those moments spent with him when they used to hold their hands together and when the time seemed to last till eternity. Her physical presence was almost invisible that evening because she had him deep in her that even the air around her was filled with his scent.

We are often lost, lost deep in our own thoughts. The thoughts that know no boundaries and when all they know is that they are meant to go miles and miles away. Okay, the last line being a bit of exaggeration. But more often than not, whatever percentage of mind that we use, our mind is seldom free..just stating the obvious. What made me mull over such a common instance is that what is it that we think about? Do we keep thinking about the same thing over and over again, until the time we get bored or do we do that because we love it so much which ultimately lets our inner self find solace within. I got no clue. I am stating just some of the many many reasons under the sun for its existence. For some, it might be money, study, friend/boyfriend/girlfriend, family, job, ambition or sex that never lets their mind be free. I don't know what is on my mind that is making me write such a shit. I don't know. But the time when I knew who was in there, he got to know it only to run away as if the place was a prison which was cuffing him down. Only if he could have realized that it was a prison in which I was jailed and not him.

P.S.: Coming to the point, I would lovvve to see your responses about what rules your mind and the reasons behind it!!!

linking of the nodes

Mr.A is our beloved MD teacher. If you haven’t met him, then you have missed out on a conceited and unearthly creature. If you have met him after my recommendation..then well it was only a recommendation. At the end of the day, it was your pick.
So we all have been taught to mug up things, so that they remain on your finger tips. And it is no different with application of cast iron, used in compression. Remember it as C-C (the former C for cast iron, the latter one for compression). Wish I had attended (physical presence is what im referring to..my mind is never there in the class) those relentlessly tedious lectures.
So here it was, my first lecture of MD, his was..ammm..im bad at triple digit numbers.
Hooks material: the blistering topic of discussion.
Question: what is the material of hooks? God!! why do I ever listen to my friends' half baked answers?
Charged as I was (after all it was my first class), I announced uproariously(my friend’s awnswer): Cast iron
A: 'khade ho jao guneet. From which company woood you get it?'
Me: 'sir..mm..Jindal Steel..'
A: 'achha..you woood get a pink slip if you join the company on the very phirst day'
Me: 'why so..?is it coz its a steel company and so it wouldnt make cast iron????'
A: 'so that means you havnt attended my C-C lecture?'
Me: 'mm..carbon copy..?'
Who said there isn’t any short cut to success? When it comes to MD there are, myriad of them. Wish i had realized this earlier..sob sob..

you were a whiff of air

the story started something like this
from the top of a cliff,
standing there, looking at the world beneath
everything gave me a notion of it being swift.

may be that was my ignorance to the world
that was standing right there in front of me,
or my very own self indulgent world
that was more than enough to suffice me.

a sudden rush of wind brushed past my ears
tried hard to whisper what I couldn't hear,
perturbed by its unexpected emergence and hustle
there was a strong feeling of an upcoming tussle.

the stronger it became with each passing second
the better I could make its presence reckon,
feeling its every brush with my hair
I wondered whether it was actually for real.

sometimes it was fierce, cold and strong
sometimes it was tender, velvety and soft,
sometimes I loathed its fierce temperament
sometimes I feared its predicament.

seconds passes by, minutes died a slow death
hours lasted till the eternity's final breath,
with every passing moment that it was there
I could feel a whiff of pleasant air.

but then all in the while that it subsisted
I couldn't think of its non existence,
and then when finally I stand there again
I get a sudden rush of feeling that was sane!!

Life is like that...

There are times when you take an often travelled road to reach your destination but often landing up on a no man's zone which is no where near to where you wanted to reach. There are times when you buy a new dress, just on the basis of its tag, its 'in-quotient', its dirt cheap price or whatever, only to realize later that it could never be worn again and its going to spend its rest of the life in your overflowing cupboard. There are times when you give into the demands of your taste buds, overindulge in all those guilty pleasures and only later to realize the repercussions of overindulgence when the needle of the weighing machine has to bend itself hard to give you a glimpse of your fat. There are times when you start reading a novel purely by being fascinated it by its book cover and after browsing through 10 odd of its pages you realize that you have found a perfect pill for your sleeping disorder.

There are times when tried and tested things go horribly wrong; when rather than discovering your true calling, you go by what others say; when the materialistic beauty is more than enough for you to pin it down to your final choice and when you purely give in to the demands and the pressure of your surroundings.

And there are times when you don't know where your life is heading to, whether it’s all that you had actually longed for. But when you actually get it, you feel like ‘Boy!! This was unexpected but still I am loving it :D’

Life is like that, where things you disliked at the first sight, activities that you found boring and people whom you loathed earlier become a reason for you to look ahead and forward with all that positivity!!

Its uncertain, unthinkable, unpredictable, inconsistence, erratic, spontaneous, fussy, unstable, impulsive and these are the very things I love it for :D.

far away from each other

All you who sleep tonight
Far from the ones you love,
No hand to left or right
And emptiness above.

Know that you aren't alone
The whole world shares your tears,
Some for two nights or one,
And some for all their years.
-
VIKRAM SETH

khwaab marte nahin

dreams never die
dreams are not like hearts, eyes or breath
which shatter into pieces and scatter
when the body dies
but dreams never die.

dreams are like light, songs and breezes
which the blackest of mountains can not block
nor burn out in hells of tyranny
they are banners that flutter in song and winds
they mount scaffolds with their heads held high.

dreams never die
dreams are words, dreams are light
like Socrates they drink cups of poison
and like mansoor thy mount the gallows with a smile. - Ahmed Faraz

LiNeS tHaT i CoUlDn'T ChAnGe !!!

people go far
away from you
you start wondering
what went go wrong
and the past becomes
a pleasant song.

longing to go back
to go back where it all started
when you could get my unspoken words
those times, those images
are now getting blurred.

am still there
where you had left me
shaken and broken by your abyss
the deep carved memories
of you
just refuse to make way for bliss.

after life

When the wind whispers in your ears
when the moon smiles at you,
just believe that its my voice you hear
and i am here right next to you!!
When the night falls around you
close your eyes,
its not an illusion that you are dreaming
its really me!!!
I love you I always will
far from here and eternity!!
though it seems that its the end
you will know it has only begun!!

GeT a LiFe!!!

How does it feel when someone comes up to you and say that you were the source of inspiration for him/her to do something? You feel nice, amazing, overwhelmed on hearing that people are following your foot steps. Well that is what most of the people around me behave on being at the receiving side (being referred to as a role model that is). But not me for sure. What I can’t understand is that why do people actually wait to get influenced by others to do something? Why can’t they explore things around them and try out those things on their own? It pisses me off big time, when someone tells me that they started doing something because of me. I listen to some particular music/singer because that makes me hum along with it, I like visiting monuments because I am curious to know about the history (who knows I might just get to know about my past too ;)), I like reading because reading stories takes me into a different world all together, I like watching movies because I like watching drama (and having popcorns ;)) and I like writing blogs because I just like it. The same might not work for the other person. But there is a breed doesn’t bother to think and just start doing it because they saw some one doing it and found him/her cool, intellectual..whatever!!. Getting influenced or making an impact onto one's life with my ideologies aint my cup of tea. Neither do I appreciate it. Individuality is what that matters. Doing what you believe in, identify with - should hold the utmost priority. People would keep coming into your life, keep influencing you now and then and make you drift and shift away from what you had set out to do..unless and until you refuse to take your stand.

Think over this, whether you still want to influence people or get influenced by them but don't get influenced, even a bit, by what ever I had written ;).

An evening in Chawri Bazar

It was yet another evening with everything usual about it. The only thing bugging my mind was my bank account's poverty-stricken and recession affected condition which has been actually deteriorating day by day (thanks to my shopping fiascos). Making few, quick bucks was on the top of mind, so that is when I thought of collecting my old, torn, worn, neglected engineering books and sell them off in chawri bazar. After much hard work and weight lifting (an average engineering book weighs around 1 kg), I headed off to chawri bazar and what a journey it was!!
It was a smooth and merry ride till came the narrow by lanes of my destination. The place was over flowing with rickshaws, bicycles, scooters, redis, cows, buffaloes and cars (and that too not with nanos..but full blown sedans and SUVs). The sight of meagre 8 feet road accommodating every possible medium of transport was actually appalling. And if this wasn't enough the road even had temporary and shift-according-to-convenience road divider of redis. Why the hell on this earth (chawri bazar in this case) did the planners (if they ever existed) put everything at one place. Name what you want and I bet nothing can beat Chawri bazar. Have a marriage..get the cards printed, doing engineering..what better place to buy books at reasonable price, need to fix up your car..get tools, steel rods..blah blah, your taste buds in dire need of finger licking food..dont even think twice before heading here..you can get chats, fast food joints, kachoris at every second shop. Visit the place at around Id, never before would you have tasted better mutton. If India is a land of diversity then Chawri Bazar for sure is the land of shopping diversity. The place looks like a big open mall where you can find everything you need or desire. And this being the primary reason for the place being overtly congested. The smoke of vehicles got me close to my first major asthmatic attack. Even the two layers of thick hanker chiefs couldn't help my cause. Twice my slipper came off and fell on the road while I was on my scooter and all thanks to the over congestion, it was as hard to find as it is to find your kumbh ke mele mein bichada hua bhai/behen. If that wasn't enough to test my nerves, then came the final nail in the coffin when my jeans was ruthlessly torn apart by some 3 feet long iron rods which were being carried by a 1.5 feet wide rickshaw. I know torn jeans are ‘in’ but this wasn't exactly the way I wanted them. Moving over the pot holes and getting a jerk at an average of 2/sec, I finally reached my destination and made a handsome money of Rs.500 (during a financial crunch, even this much looks fab). Grabbing the money and books I finally and quickly turned to make an exit. I wasn't expecting the return journey to be any smooth. To my amazement (bewildered by the initial route, I took a new one this time even though a major risk it was), it was the other way around. It was not exactly bad as I had thought, until I reached a lane with three cows standing across the street, not even leaving an iota of space to go through. As my luck would have it, I had to go back by the route I came from, which was buzzing even more. Afraid of loosing my hard earned money in the mad rush, I safely put it in inner shirt's pocket.
While on my way to home, I came across a billboard saying 'hum badlenge to badlegi delhi'. I wonder how far this is true. All right, agreed that we make the place we live in but while we are doing our bit towards the society (I never throw waste on the roads, never spit, take care of street dogs, plant trees, avoid vehicle whenever possible), aint it government's responsibility to at least have a look at this situation, to restore the old charm of Chawri Bazar, to make it look like what it used to be..of beautiful tombs, darwaze, mosques. This metro clearly aint helping the cause.
The 2 hour journey which was supposed to be of 1 hour finally ended but not before making me feel nauseating, thinking and short of fresh breath. But then, I took out my Rs.500 note, felt its warmth, and basked in the glory of earning my hard earned money!!!

just one job

Maruti, Infosys, Kukuku or is it Kukoku..err..I guess its kukuko. Well, who cares..people just want a job. The above mentioned names are companies which have visited my college for the placements thus far. Boy!!..people are actually getting despos..for a job, I mean to say(except for some carefree creatures like P.J).
Anyways..I was wondering and pondering over the reasons, as to why we need a job. Listing down some(refraining from the usual stuff):

1. No clue about the future. With a job in hand, you would at least have one. So what, if it is bleak!!
2. Enough of college life. Its time to get pro. So what, if being a pro would make you a self centered, inhuman and a shrewd person.
3. Enough of living on parents salary. So what, if your parents are super rich who can feed you throughout your life.
4. Move away from parents, friends, yourself. So what, if the last time you went away from home for a week..you broke down the very next day.
5. Want a change. So what, if the very same change is going to bug you down after just few months.
6. Want to be with new set of people. So what, if those very new faces would be first one to back stab you at you every step.

Well I any day and any time would fall in to the first category..going the way the flow of the river is taking me to. Making least bit of any effort, what-so-ever to change its direction..
Which category do you fall into? or did I miss out on your kind.
Suggestions are more than invited.. =)

P.S. People seeking a job presently, take this bit of free advice..stay away from this post ;).